Incoherency

I have engaged upon this journey in order to fulfill my need for atonement. I need to apologize for being so apologetic. Restart- restart.  I need not apologize for nothing. Redemption is not in my perceptive vocabulary. Sense and sensibility has been the governing force behind my fortune (or misfortune). Strange how i never came to liquify this fortune. Oxymoron is what i am. Oxy as in acidic, and moron as in Moron. An acidic moron miniature of epic proportions. Atonement for what, crime or otherwise? No need, no will. Emphatic thrusts and counterthrusts. Waves of sorrys and tsunamis of bullshit. It's so distinct in all this mess. What I need is what I am. What I want is what I will never be. And I am what I've always needed but never wanted. Locked up- brain damage.

The numbness is not as comfortable as Floyd assumed. You've been warned. The numbness is unique in its ability to remove any sound from your sight, any sight from your hearing or any thought from your limbs. The numbness hires and fires perceptions at will. It allows "little escapes" into feelings- but you always have to report right back in. I love my numbness- i guess that's a feeling. It allows for my esoteric misconception of instances not to escape into the open and ridicule my already ridiculous inexistence. It was formed a womb where the amniotic fluid is mostly formalin which preserves  tissue or cells thoughts  by reversibly cross-linking primary amino groups primal fears in proteins with other nearby nitrogen atoms in protein or DNA  grey matter through a -CH₂- linkage. Enough with Wikipedia science though. Bottom line is that there is no chance for me to have a coherent thought that would lead to legible piece of writing. Love it. Have a nice day.